My First Night in Thailand

…I’m so freaking happy that I decided to capture the RAW emotion of my first night in Thailand.  

The rollercoaster waves.  

The processing that it was all finally happening, after so much time of fantasizing about it.

It was 11 PM or so there.  I was coming off of 40-some hours of international travel.  

I had absolutely zero plan whatsoever outside of getting there.  

I ended up at this random hotel that had a discount on Booking.com .  It was outdated, yet luxurious at the same time- I thought it’d be a good treat to myself to settle in there with a giant bath tub & a rose-covered bed. 

Figuring out how to get a cab from the airport to there was intimidating to say the least (although it all ended up fine).  

So was realizing I needed to get Thai Bhat out of the ATM to do so.  

All at 10 PM in a completely foreign place. 

Realizing I didn’t know a single lick of the Thai language.  

“Damn, we’ve got a lot to learn, don’t we?  It’s realllllll now!” (Thank goddess for @soulbeefree)

These videos represent everything I was feeling that evening.

The “Oh my Gosh I finally did it!… We’re really here.  It’s REAL.”  But also the slight “Alrighty girl, no turning back…”

The freedom, & yet strangeness, of sleeping in a bed alone for the first time in a very long time, & for the first time ever in a whole new continent.  

I held myself in a very special way that night.  Feeling all the feels, letting it ALLLL pour in (& out)

I felt so brave, and so proud of myself, for finally answering the call.  For getting there safe & sound.  For doing something that scared me.  

I hold this evening so sacred in my heart… I love watching these videos of what now feels like a younger Mar, at her point of breaking through.  I’m really freaking proud of Her <3